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| The kids come a runnin' and they even followed the rules: No Parking on Grass! |
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| However, the euphemism above was completely intended! |
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Pedo-Van FoF Style
Often there are times I see work vans going down the road or parked at shopping centers and I wonder, "Which of these could be Pedo-Vans?". Look no further folks, I think I found the vehicle that wins first prize:
To keep things going, in FoF tradition, this pedo-van also, ironically, pulled out on Moundy McT later in the afternoon. She, of course, snapped a pic and sent it to me! Here you go kiddies (no pun intended):
That is all for now, folks. I hope you like the new style and I hope to have more fail (FoF) for you soon!
Does Your Sac Hang Low?
If not, then you can always get a set and hang them from the back of your car:
Don't forget to get big tires for your hoopty if you want to go for a Full-On Fail! Stay tuned for the Pedo-Mobile; coming soon!
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| I know it looks more like a shadow, but traffic started to move. |
Friday, May 13, 2011
Full-On Fail: Ke$ha Blows Edition
For this FoF edition, I highly recommend muting or turning off your speakers. I am bringing you a Ke$ha (‘nuff said) video that fails so “full-on”, you don’t even need to hear the Full-On Fail lyrics or composition. However, after this little exercise, you may want to just listen to some of the witty, hipster banter for “S’s & G’s”.
Part One: Watch the video. Don’t listen…
(It really takes away from the visual smorgasbord of fail)
Part Two: Let’s Discuss. More accurately, I am going to write and you are going to read!
First of all, tragic, wasn’t it?!?!
Next, to catch the banter and fully appreciate the other A/V candy (it’s free by the way), I recommend turning on or unmuting the speakers for the remainder of this posting!
On to some highlights and quips…
Unicorn heads? Licking and making out with unicorn heads? Yeah, we get it Ke$ha, you are really pushing those Hipster boundaries, way to go! -.-
Sadly, this video really showcases the few facial expressions Ke$ha is able to believably pull off; dumb, I am trying to look like a sexy, and Jules from Cougar Town’s “finger guns”.
Seriously, did she go to Joe Tribbiani’s school for Smell-The-Farts acting?
If you don’t know what that is,bunnies, then read the script below and watch the video:
SCRIPT:
RACHEL: Did I miss it? Did I miss it?
JOEY: No, I'm on right after this guy shoots himself.
CHANDLER: Whoa, she's pretty.
JOEY: Yeah, and she's really nice too. She taught me all about how to work the cameras, and smell-the-fart acting.
RACHEL: I'm sorry, what?
MONICA: What?
JOEY: It's like, you got so many lines to learn so fast, that sometimes you need a minute to remember your next one. So while you're thinkin' of it, you take this big pause where you look all intense, you know, like this.
CHANDLER: Oh, ok.
JOEY: There's my scene, there's my scene. "Mrs. Wallace, I'm Dr. Drake Ramoray, your sister's neurosurgeon.
MRS. WALLACE: Is she gonna be all right?
JOEY: I'm afraid the situation is much worse than we expected. Your sister is suffering from a (smell-the-fart) sub-cranial hematoma. Perhaps we can discuss this over coffee.
CHANDLER: Nice!
RACHEL: That's great!
ROSS: Excellent!
CHANDLER: For a minute there I thought you were actually tryin' to smell something.
Don’t believe me, look below:
Next, we move on to rainbow ray gun fights? Really?!?! The only person I know that can make ray guns truly funny is my mother.
Although, I will give her a small amount of credit, she does the smell-the-fart acting really well in these scenes even though unicorns were hurt in the making of them:
Finally, I will mention the insertion of James Van Der Beek (a.k.a. van der douche and van der dead) to this FoF tragedy. James, did you really need the money THAT bad? I mean, I know Dawson’s Creek was like a million years ago and the few teen movies you made kind of “did you in” with the stereo-typing (Varsity Blues, Rules of Attraction, Scary Movie, etc.), but really?!?!?! Very little outside of being Dawson Leery has made even so much as a dent in the Hollywood stain of fame; brief one-episode appearances on some popular shows and, of course, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back rank up there with some of my favorites. I will give you credit that the Van Der Week stuff made me laugh.
This role, in Ke$ha’s Blow video, had me drawing parallels between you and Bob Saget.
Let me explain.
Bob Saget had Full House and Van Der Beek had Dawson’s Creek. Bob Saget had a reprise with America’s Funniest Home Videos and Van Der Beek had a few popular culture movies staples to keep him in the news. Bob Saget turned to comedy to keep his career moving while Van Der Beek had guest roles on television to keep him afloat. Finally, Bob Saget had a role in the cult-coveted “Half Baked”, which produced the “I sucked dick for coke” line of infamy. Van Der Beek has met that cult fame with this tragic FoF video. At least they can laugh at themselves.
So, in closing…
Have a great day and I hope you enjoyed the vent o’ FoF!
In addition, try not to listen to Ke$ha. It has been known to kill brain cells and immaculately combust into STD’s.
Part One: Watch the video. Don’t listen…
(It really takes away from the visual smorgasbord of fail)
Part Two: Let’s Discuss. More accurately, I am going to write and you are going to read!
First of all, tragic, wasn’t it?!?!
Next, to catch the banter and fully appreciate the other A/V candy (it’s free by the way), I recommend turning on or unmuting the speakers for the remainder of this posting!
On to some highlights and quips…
Unicorn heads? Licking and making out with unicorn heads? Yeah, we get it Ke$ha, you are really pushing those Hipster boundaries, way to go! -.-
Sadly, this video really showcases the few facial expressions Ke$ha is able to believably pull off; dumb, I am trying to look like a sexy, and Jules from Cougar Town’s “finger guns”.
Seriously, did she go to Joe Tribbiani’s school for Smell-The-Farts acting?
If you don’t know what that is,bunnies, then read the script below and watch the video:
SCRIPT:
RACHEL: Did I miss it? Did I miss it?
JOEY: No, I'm on right after this guy shoots himself.
CHANDLER: Whoa, she's pretty.
JOEY: Yeah, and she's really nice too. She taught me all about how to work the cameras, and smell-the-fart acting.
RACHEL: I'm sorry, what?
MONICA: What?
JOEY: It's like, you got so many lines to learn so fast, that sometimes you need a minute to remember your next one. So while you're thinkin' of it, you take this big pause where you look all intense, you know, like this.
CHANDLER: Oh, ok.
JOEY: There's my scene, there's my scene. "Mrs. Wallace, I'm Dr. Drake Ramoray, your sister's neurosurgeon.
MRS. WALLACE: Is she gonna be all right?
JOEY: I'm afraid the situation is much worse than we expected. Your sister is suffering from a (smell-the-fart) sub-cranial hematoma. Perhaps we can discuss this over coffee.
CHANDLER: Nice!
RACHEL: That's great!
ROSS: Excellent!
CHANDLER: For a minute there I thought you were actually tryin' to smell something.
Don’t believe me, look below:
 |
| Smell It |
 |
| I'm Sexy |
 |
| I'm Playful AND Sexy |
 |
| finger guns! |
 |
| I'm Dumb |
 |
| I'm Sexy |
 |
| I tilt my head back for more sexy... |
 |
| And, I do this repeatedly. |
 |
| Oh and I'm dumb again... |
Next, we move on to rainbow ray gun fights? Really?!?! The only person I know that can make ray guns truly funny is my mother.
Although, I will give her a small amount of credit, she does the smell-the-fart acting really well in these scenes even though unicorns were hurt in the making of them:
 |
| Smelling it, real good! |
 |
| emoting the smell... |
 |
| ACTING!!!!!!! |
 |
| Poor Unicorns: Death by their own rainbow design! |
Finally, I will mention the insertion of James Van Der Beek (a.k.a. van der douche and van der dead) to this FoF tragedy. James, did you really need the money THAT bad? I mean, I know Dawson’s Creek was like a million years ago and the few teen movies you made kind of “did you in” with the stereo-typing (Varsity Blues, Rules of Attraction, Scary Movie, etc.), but really?!?!?! Very little outside of being Dawson Leery has made even so much as a dent in the Hollywood stain of fame; brief one-episode appearances on some popular shows and, of course, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back rank up there with some of my favorites. I will give you credit that the Van Der Week stuff made me laugh.
This role, in Ke$ha’s Blow video, had me drawing parallels between you and Bob Saget.
 |
| Half Baked Saget |
 |
| Van Der Douche Blown |
Let me explain.
Bob Saget had Full House and Van Der Beek had Dawson’s Creek. Bob Saget had a reprise with America’s Funniest Home Videos and Van Der Beek had a few popular culture movies staples to keep him in the news. Bob Saget turned to comedy to keep his career moving while Van Der Beek had guest roles on television to keep him afloat. Finally, Bob Saget had a role in the cult-coveted “Half Baked”, which produced the “I sucked dick for coke” line of infamy. Van Der Beek has met that cult fame with this tragic FoF video. At least they can laugh at themselves.
So, in closing…
Have a great day and I hope you enjoyed the vent o’ FoF!
In addition, try not to listen to Ke$ha. It has been known to kill brain cells and immaculately combust into STD’s.
Thursday, May 12, 2011
Full-On Kuntry-Grammer
It has been a bit since my last posting, but while at work the other day, I came across this site:
You're welcome, and have another great FoF Day!
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Please note the logo vs. the page title... |
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