Wednesday, November 9, 2011

A Series Of Unfortunate Full-On Fails

Welcome to another installment of Full-On Fail.  This time we will look at a few tales of FoF woe.  These stories come from Mary Brown and me.  All of these stories are true, though, all nouns (people, places, and things) have changed.

Story #1 was provided by Ms. Mary Brown:

As Mary Brown opened her email to begin her day, she was confronted with a terrifyingly tragic event, indeed.  Her first email was from "The Family Guy", and it was riddled with countless typos and grammatical errors.  This is quite commonplace with him, but the true FoF occured when she reached his follow-up email, which read:

"Sorry I hit send bfore spell check. Howevwer, it is just wghat we were talking about ."

Well, ummm, some of the words were spelled right, correct?  "The Family Guy" (ficticious psuedonym) has been Full-On Failed.

Story #2 was also provided by Ms. Mary Brown.

Later in the day, Mary Brown's email lit up again with another FoF.  This one came from another department, but from someone who has been around long enough to know better.  She will be known, for the purposes of this story as "Busch Gardens".  Busch did not seem to remember the universal email address convention implemented by our establishment.  For those not in the "know", it is a first initial / last name convention, which has been in place since the dawn of time, AND not at all complex.  However, she (Mary Brown) received this message:

"Is 'The Water Boy' still in charge of the 'Water Filtration System'?  If so, can I please have his email address?"

"Busch Gardens" has been Full-On Failed.

Last, but not least...

Story #3 is provided to you by me.

I went for my midday tinkle break, which is quite normal, yet equally scary since a trip to the restroom can be a distressful experience.  It can be full of non-handwashers, cell phone-talkers, seat pee'ers, and the gambit of other disgustingly unhygenic hooligans.  On this occasion, however, I ran into something all together new and terrifying.  As I entered the bathroom, I was greeted by "Persons Unknown", and they stopped me from entering the stall to ask me how the faucet worked.  That's right, ladies and gentleman, I was asked how to use a pull knob faucet in a public restroom.

Mr. Bunny even knows that this was truly a travesty.  A travesty of Full-On Fail proportions.  This is why I refuse to touch much of anything in those restrooms and always use hand sanitizer once I get back to my office.

I hope this has at least entertained you and possibly made your life seem a little less serious!  You may completely laugh at the series of unfortunate FoF's that Mary and I struggle with daily!

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